shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize