I am in a vortex of obligation.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
