you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
