is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
