Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Randomize