The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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