That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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