Im at strip club and am horny
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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