I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
