vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
How's work?
Spinning.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
Randomize
