Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
