the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize