I wish I could teleport
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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