elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Randomize
