can we get nightvision for the apartment?
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
