I want to stick my p in your. b.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Randomize
