I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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