you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
