No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Randomize
