fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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