He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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