So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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