He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
