i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
