I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize