He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize