Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I have fence marks all over my body
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Randomize
