I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Ketchup is God's man juice
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
