:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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