If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I would ride that face into the sunset
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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