We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
