I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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