Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
worst night to have a conscience
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
