Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Randomize