But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Ketchup is God's man juice
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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