Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Randomize
