I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
