Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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