if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
