Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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