PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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