he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
