You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
