I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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