Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know đ
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when youâre on top.
You went after him with a sword while screaming âFAJITAS!â. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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