oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
He felt like a one man threesome
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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