I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Randomize