i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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