Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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