i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
