so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
