She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
