I'm pants shitting drunk right now
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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